Why? - 2011

Why is it, that everyone loves me,

But no one ever loves me enough?

Why do I let myself believe in what they say,

When I know what will happen in the end?

Why do I hope and dream for love

When love is just a knife’s twist?

Why I am I never able to resist?

Why do I hope this one will be different?

That I won’t end up alone in the end?

It happens every time I fall

This twisting knife inside my soul

Maybe this time the gaping hole

Will refuse to heal, will never seal

Maybe then I’ll be left in pieces

To hoard and keep safe inside myself

Away from feeling for someone else

Those wonderful things love stories sell

Feelings that leave you in a private hell

To grieve for that which might have been

That beautiful future lost again.

So here I sit, alone again, trying hard

To pretend I’m not nearly blind from pain.

It’s never worth it in the end,

To love when others just pretend

© Lilliana Louise Delanor 2011